Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
truck drivers should not leave their trucks unlocked with cigarettes inside when we're drunk and walking around.
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
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