she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
I remember her making the first martini but the rest of the weekend is a blur of vodka, high heels and sex toys.
First time being used by a cougar. Definitely okay with it
Randomize
