We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
You need a twittervention. You're better than this.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
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