I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
Yo, I can't just ask my mom where she relocated my vibrator to, can I?
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Randomize
