her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize
