so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
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