They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
Randomize
