Playing drinking games to Nancy Grace totally counts as "keeping up with current events.."
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I want to die. Marc and I were making out in the hallway and fell into a fire hose in a glass case. It shattered everywhere. Everyone thought we fell out a window. I think I have glass in my back. Awesome.
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
I feel as if the hash cupcakes on top of mushroom chocolates was a little excessive last night
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Randomize