The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
High enough to fry lime slices.....tasted like shit, by the way
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I made out with a guy who was dressed as Borat
And like a minute in, I was like oh fuck what am I doing
Did you run away?
I DANCED AWAY.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
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