Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
just took my exes job. there should be an award for how many times I've managed to fuck that girl's life
She just used a chaser for red wine.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
I hate when my Bumble matches make it hard for me to stalk them.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
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