Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
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