If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Don't forget to grab a pregnancy test and sloppy joe mix for tonight
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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