dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
Also you know what's worse than drunk texting? Drunk leaving soup on your hot neighbor's porch.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I don't know what I was talking about but I just threw up in ikea. You can't get out of this place it's a fucking labyrinth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Panties = found
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