Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
I just had my first non-cocaine-induced nosebleed for the first time in 2 years. This calls for a celebration.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
