I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
She's 40ish and I couldn't wake her up with a stick of dynamite. My sheets are going to be covered in glitter lotion and smell like grape vodka and shattered dreams tomorrow.
Aren't divorce parties fun?
You and I have very different definitions of fun.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize
