Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
I've decided to only have meaningless sex from now on.
And what brought this epiphany?
I've decided it's a lot easier to have dirty amazing sex with someone when you don't care about the other person or what they think of you. I'm going to test this theory soon. Will update you later
people are starting to question the shark bite story
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
Randomize
