i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
Every time I think about it I can feel His toe in my mouth and I gag, I'm scarred for life.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
Randomize
