In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
Hey I never found my wallet but i did find a bag of 14 soft taco supremes
I have your wallet. Trade you for the tacos.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Nothing like snapchatring dick pics to a\nMarried woman while your girlfriend destroys Taco Bell in the next room. Almost caught, worth it. Got boobs back
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
So i walked around campus drunk and alone last night eating pizza and a lunchable from 7-11. Sat by the flag pole and drank an entire liter of water, took off my shoes to prance around in the fountain, then stepped in dog shit on the way home...barefoot.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
Randomize
