On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Hah I guess I sent that to like ten people, along with another one of me sitting in a bath tub eating an ice cream sandwich.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
Randomize
