the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Semen is not good for contacts.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Randomize
