I want to have your abortion
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
If I'm going to start compromising my butthole it's going to be for much better drugs than a ventolin
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
My relationship: I'm wearing batman panties and a tiara right now trying to get laid and he's doing dishes.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
Randomize
