He is an equal opportunity slut.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
He's more than prepared to help us move. Dude brought sunscreen, cans of Coke, and Captain Morgan.
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Okay, this next statement may sound like a red flag but I'm tellin you, shotgunning those two beers really helped me love my child more effectively. Honest.
Randomize
