Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
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