***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
My mouth holds just enough water for my bong
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Thanks for walking over, a conversation about David Bowie's dick as a muppet is exactly what my day was missing.
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
i need some magic done to my vagina
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
But we have bathrooms and they dont
Randomize
