Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
I love you. I'm too high for this. Find a way. Make it happen. Live strong.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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