Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I stayed up for an hour trying to make my room stop spinning and then I realized it was bc my fan was on
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I'm not gay but if a lesbian wants to eat my box out I'm not gonna say no to someone who knows what they're doing.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
