I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
So I'm cool with the whole break up, but it sure is a shame we didn't get to use those handcuffs.
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
29 Times Beach Sex Ended With Sand In All The Wrong Places
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet