Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (617): His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava http://tfl.nu/q9zi
  Replies (164) Good night (2200) Bad night (3484)
• Favorite

  (601): View more from Mississippi

  your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (601): your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible... http://tfl.nu/v1vf
  Replies (33) Good night (6979) Bad night (1061)
• Favorite

  (541): View more from Oregon

  i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (541): i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar. http://tfl.nu/crfd
  Replies (7) Good night (3250) Bad night (1910)
• Favorite

  (512): View more from Texas

  just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (512): just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification. http://tfl.nu/d300
  Replies (12) Good night (6034) Bad night (890)
• Favorite

  (734): View more from Michigan

  I wish I had a frozen water bed.

  (253): View more from Washington

  best. idea. ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (734): I wish I had a frozen water bed. (253): best. idea. ever. http://tfl.nu/r1w7
  Replies (58) Good night (5744) Bad night (2011)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (205): Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable. http://tfl.nu/h65h
  Replies (4) Good night (3450) Bad night (1090)
• Favorite

  (408): View more from California

  My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (408): My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know? http://tfl.nu/68pr
  Replies (8) Good night (2465) Bad night (1125)
• Favorite

  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (608): all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!'' http://tfl.nu/g7vx
  Replies (22) Good night (7140) Bad night (859)
• Favorite

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (781): In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time http://tfl.nu/v2fu
  Replies (8) Good night (2349) Bad night (825)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (360): she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love http://tfl.nu/d5q9
  Replies (22) Good night (2122) Bad night (583)
• Favorite

  (253): View more from Washington

  If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (253): If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life. http://tfl.nu/jc0t
  Replies (15) Good night (3287) Bad night (776)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (618): I'm about one sudden movement away from being able to cross "throw up in a fortune 100 company's bathroom" off my bucket list. http://tfl.nu/7l9z
  Replies (7) Good night (1061) Bad night (461)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  You're the best wingman ever.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (702): We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you. (843): You're the best wingman ever. http://tfl.nu/wgzf
  Replies (13) Good night (2524) Bad night (607)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (310): Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself http://tfl.nu/zndp
  Replies (5) Good night (1251) Bad night (480)
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here http://tfl.nu/s5pw
  Replies (2) Good night (372) Bad night (206)

Randomize