just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
You smell like stripper and shame
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
Just saw the first guy I gave head to lose in the french open...some how I feel better that my mistake made it to the same mistake as our relationship, the third round. Don't judge.
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
In conversation she brought up that she slept with Tucker Max on the UF football field
one minute he's happily playing with a lighter and the next thing I know, he's screaming and the swing set is on fire
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.