yeah my mom told me she knows when i come home high because i use my turn signal while turning into the driveway...
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
We pulled over so he could pee and the next thing I know he's running down the hill by himself with his pants down
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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