Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
