Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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