every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
Randomize
