So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Maybe you should slow down tonight...
KINGS DON'T NEED ADVICE FROM LITTLE HORN-BILLS FOR A START
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
