You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
I do have a moral compass! I can’t help it if it only points at penises
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