Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
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Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
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Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
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