Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
woke up next to the new dishwasher. set the record for banging a new employee to 6 hours...i should be a professional sexual predator
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
