You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
Being a fine ass woman in a world full of fuckboys is the realest struggle I've ever known.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
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