just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
So we went to home depot to buy supplies to build a beer bong but ended up buying an office water cooler that were going to put vodka in
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woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
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i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
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