It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He said he "doesnt care at all, really" if I shave my legs or not. Challenge accepted.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
I've washed my hands three times and it still smells like Astroglide.
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
welp,tonight ive reached new levels. by new levels I mean,i showed some guys my boobs for water. on your tab.. the most pointless thing ive ever done. either we should hang out way more,or never again.
Randomize
