oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
I got drunken sympathy for the whales' plight last night and signed up to give $50 monthly to Greenpeace. Calling to cancel was worse than the hangover.
Hear that? That's the wail of a dying whale. Murderer.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
WTF. I was 99% sure I went straight home last night. I just woke up hugging a chair, and my tux pocket has a flask filled with what I think is red bull and gatorade. This has to be your doing.
Randomize
