Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I walked a mile in this weather wearing nothing but a toga. Zero fucks. Your move Mother Nature.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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