He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
I ate an entire popcorn ball before bed. I know that because there is popcorn stuck to my poncho. Also. I'm still drunk. Also. I made out with a 19 year old. Also. #barnparties
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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