Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
