found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I feel like I've been drunk all of June. And I am in NO WAY ashamed about it.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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