Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
this girl is like a spa retreat for my dick
Tommorow.Eggs Benedict and surprise blowjob day
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
If you get that boat I will recruit some boat hoes for you and tape a video and sync it to I'm On A Boat. This is happening.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
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