Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
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