Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
So we walked by this chick's house and she starts yelling at her boyfriend "STOP HITTING ME WITH YOUR DICK"
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Had to. She was getting married in 2 days & her vag was having a close out sale. You know I love a good bargain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
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