This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
Today we memorialize my orgasms. Taken from me over six months ago, gone too soon. Here's to hoping we'll see one again
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Randomize
