I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
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