hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
I only make drug deals in a British accent. It's my way of making sure it doesn't get too sketch.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
Broke up w/ my married coworker...work is gonna get weird.
At one point you starting double fisting oreos in your mouth confused about how you got out of the car
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
So apparently I’m into choking now
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