it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Randomize
