I can tuck mytits in my pants
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
I woke up naked, with 10 visible bite marks and a black eye. I'm just going to assume that it was a good night.
30+ People Share Their Worst ‘Intimate Experience’ And They’re Traumatizing
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
25 Shocking High School Scandals You Won’t Believe Are True
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.