actually, I'm a sock model
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
I'm in too deep with Breaking Bad. I realized I've altered my Tinder likes to people that either look like Jesse or work in a school's Science department.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Why was I drunk tweeting incorrect Beyonce lyrics last night?
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
